Wednesday, April 5, 2006

April not a good month

April is the month my Cecy died...April 14 to be exact. I still miss her.

I love this picture of her surrounded by her family. She was love.

I had lunch with  Catherine her daughter yesterday. It was hard to see her cry for her mom. I felt helpless.....I knew nothing I said would really help the pain. The mom in me wanted to scoop her up and cradle her.

I didn't... we were at a sandwich shop and I knew she wouldn't want attention drawn to her.

I felt like I could see her heart breaking as we sat and talked. I told her on the anniversary we could so something to celebrate her mom's life. She seemed good with that. I told her it was up to her if she needed to be alone I understood that also.

I talked with her about my feelings and what I went through to let her know that what she was feeling was normal .I think she is going through a gamete of emotions...

she mention that she liked talking to me I seemed wise and she learned a lot.

I laughed and told her that is because I'm 44 lets hope I learned something in all these years. she Laughed!!

I sat in my car and watched her walk up the stairs to her apartment...wishing there was more that I could do for her.

I know Cecy was above watching...I promise her I would watch out for her babies...

We miss you Cecy..

Love forever,

Donna

 

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

What a sad day indeed.  I am greatly sorry for your loss.

Hang in there sweets.  I know Cecy is up there wearing a smile and is so proud of you for being there for her girl.

Stacy

Anonymous said...

They look such a happy family Donna ~ it is so Sad she is no longer with them ~ I'm glad Catherine likes talking to you that must help her ~ and Cecy I am sure is watching over her and thanking you for caring for her children ~ Ally

Anonymous said...

It's always hard to have these dates come around when we miss someone so much.  It's really good of you to stay in touch with Cecy's daughter and to give her the time to share, cry and let out some of her emotions.  I hope your doing okay too!  :)

Michele
http://journals.aol.com/SamNsmile5/LettingItAllSinkIn

Anonymous said...

It is sad when the dates we lose someone come around again and remind us. She looks so happy and healthy in the picture. My month of pain comes in June when I lost my sister and niece. Time does heal the pain. I don't know how it is for someone who has lost their mother, though. Especially when they are still so young, and need a mom/friend. Catherine has you, not the same, but it is good just the same. Bea

Anonymous said...

so sorry about Cecy, it's so sad. It's nice that her daughter has you to talk with.

Anonymous said...

I'm so happy you are there for your friend's children.  I am sure she is smiling down from heaven.  
Hugs and love,
Lisa

Anonymous said...

This just brings tears to my eyes...
I can feel your pain, as i just lost my aunt last
month from cancer... I am so very sorry Donna.
Cecy would be(is) so proud of you for taking care of her
kids emotionally(being there for them to talk to)....i just know she is!
((((((((((((((((((Donna)))))))))))))))))))

~Terri~

Anonymous said...

This was a great tribute to your lost friend.

Chris
http://inanethoughtsandinsaneramblings.blogspot.com/

Anonymous said...

I'm just taking a look for editor of the week! Congrats. As Pam's memorial service is going on now & I read this I thought perhaps Catherine & Pam's daughter might make an email connection & might be able to connect spirit wise both having lost a mom. It might be helpful. Did you read Pam's blog?

Anonymous said...

April is the month my dear mother died...April 13th. 1945 the day after Pres. F.D. Roodevelt died.  That has been more than 61 years ago and I, too, still miss her.  She, Eleanor, was only 30 years old when she died of a burst tubal pregnancy.  Our family was never the same, after her death, but all of us were able to heal and realize that she had done her very best for our benefit during our infancy and childhood.  My sister, Jean, was only 10 years old and I was 11.  We had learned so much in that brief time...because 'mom' taught us about love, honesty and compassion for others.  These will be the most lovely things that Cecys' daughter and children will remember, too. Both my sister and I have had 61 years of developing our own personalities as: wives, mothers, sisters, grandmothers and the daughters of Eleanor.  Please visit my blogs/journal site at gmomowow@aol.com thetruthaboutmom for more encouragement to share with all the 'children of mothers'.  With sincere wishes for comfort.   Gramma Pat

Anonymous said...

you are love D!

Derek